Sermon delivered Sunday, July 21, 2013 (9 Pentecost, Year C, Proper 11), at St. Paul’s Episcopal Church, Franklin, TN (Luke 10:38-42.
In today’s Gospel from Luke, we hear the familiar story of Mary and Martha. This passage is a favorite for use in women’s Sunday School classes or women’s retreats, where women are often asked, “Are you ‘a Martha’ or ‘a Mary’?”– which is just church code language for asking whether you are a “Type A” personality, organized and task-oriented, or a “Type B” personality, more carefree and process-oriented.
In an attempt to soften the edge for poor Martha, who often gets a bad rep as the uptight taskmaster, the leaders or facilitators will sometimes reassure those of us who identify with Martha that being “a Martha” is not a bad thing, that Mary and Martha were both devoted followers of our Lord; they just had different ways of showing their devotion. Martha showed her devotion by taking care of the details and preparing the house, while Mary showed her devotion by sitting with Jesus and listening to his teachings. The assumption is generally that both ways of showing devotion are equally valid, just different – so that those of us who identify with Martha don’t wind up feeling “less than” our friends who are more contemplative like Mary.
But if we look closely at the text, Jesus actually does issue a value judgment about Mary and Martha’s behavior and motivations. Nowhere in the passage does Jesus say that both Mary and Martha’s ways of being are equally valid. Instead, Jesus says that “Mary has chosen the better part, which will not be taken away from her” (Luke 10:42).
Now, in Martha’s defense, she was probably doing all the appropriate things a woman would be supposed to do in that culture to prepare for a house guest – preparing a meal, washing the guest’s feet, offering the guest a place to stay. There was a lot of work to be done to offer proper hospitality to a guest, and Martha was the kind of woman who was going to make sure everything was taken care of, and done well. This in and of itself is not a bad thing – and Jesus does not chastise her for her attention to detail or her desire to provide appropriate hospitality to a guest. Instead, he critiques her because she is “worried and distracted by many things.” The problem is not with her actions, but with her mindset.
The “better part” that her sister Mary has chosen is to sit at Jesus’s feet and listen to his teachings – which was the position of a disciple. For this moment, at least, Mary has remembered her identity as a beloved child of God and a disciple of Christ. By contrast, Martha has lost sight of her identity – her mind is on tasks to be done rather than on the joy of being in the presence of her Lord.
We really have no way of knowing whether Mary was really a “Type B” kind of person, always laid back and happy to sit in blissful meditation all day long, or whether she could be just as task-oriented and organized as Martha at times. And we don’t know for sure that Martha didn’t know how to stop doing and just be. Maybe she was just as capable of sitting still as Mary was. But the point is that whatever their usual habits or personality types, in this particular moment, Mary is in a better “head space” than her sister Martha. She is able to be truly present with Jesus during his visit, something that Martha cannot do because of her many worries and distractions. Mary has not lost sight of the forest for the trees, so to speak. She has not gotten so caught up in preparing for Jesus’s visit that she forgets to actually enjoy his visit.
How many of us have been there – so caught up in the details of what needs to be done to prepare for a big event that we forget that this event was supposed to be an enjoyable and joyous occasion? I’m sure any one of us could share a few stories about that friend who gets so caught up in the details of entertaining that everyone feels like they’re on pins and needles at her parties because her stress levels are so high – or an uncle who was so obsessed with arranging the details of where everyone was going to stay at the family reunion that he ruined the event for everyone – or the boss who was so worried about taking care of details for the big corporate event that he didn’t seem to enjoy the event at all.
While it is true that each of us have a little of both “Martha” and “Mary” in us, it is also true that their behaviors in this story do represent distinctive personality types. Some of us are more prone than others to “worried and distracted” behavior. Some of us are more likely to let the details kill the spirit of the event, to get so caught up in the moment that we lose sight of the big picture. If you feel a bit uncomfortable by how much you see yourself in Martha’s behavior in this story, then the lesson in this story is particularly important for you. That lesson is this: the details are important, but they are never more important than the spirit of the task. Things are never more important than people. Expectations, customs, and to-do lists are never more important than relationships.
This is not to say that we should throw out all our to-do lists and go meditate under a tree somewhere and stop working or feeding our children. It is important to “do” things sometimes, and we can show our devotion to God through service. The passage immediately preceding the story of Martha and Mary is the story of the Good Samaritan, which we heard last Sunday – and that is certainly a story that shows the importance of serving others, that teaches us that faith must be rooted in action. If the Good Samaritan had not done something, the injured man’s needs would not have been met. But imagine what the story would be like if the Good Samaritan had helped the man, but while doing so he was irritated and worried because taking the time to help this man was really delaying him from his next appointment, and while he was going with him to the inn, he started yelling at the priests and Levites who passed by, “You call yourselves spiritual leaders? And you’re leaving me to do all the work?” That would certainly change our perception and assessment of the “Good Samaritan,” wouldn’t it?
With Martha, the issue was not her actions, but her attitude. Active, loving service is an important part of a vibrant life of faith. But worries, distractions, and resentment are not. This is why it is so important for those us with strong “Martha tendencies” to remind ourselves that it is precisely in those moments when we feel like we don’t have enough time to enjoy life that it is most important to take time to do so: to take off the apron and sit down in living room to enjoy a drink with your guests, to take a break from the project for work and go out for a hike with your friends or family, to let go of structure and constant words in your prayer life and allow yourself to simply be in God’s presence.
The “better part” that Mary chose was to be attentive to the present moment, to sit at the feet of her Lord and remember her identity as a disciple. If you ever find yourself getting so caught up in a task that you forget why you’re doing it in the first place, or begin to become resentful of those who aren’t doing it, you might think of Mary sitting at the feet of Jesus, and take a step back and remember who and whose you are. You, like Mary, are a disciple of the Lord, invited to sit and be still at his feet. You are a child of God, a God who loves you and wants to spend time with you just as you are. A God who comes to visit you, just as he came to visit Mary and Martha, and who desires not a household put in perfect order, but an open heart ready to receive him.
